In The Presence Of Holiness

I am roommates with a saint. Let me tell you his story, and you tell me whether this is a divine miracle or not.

He had a class last semester which required him to turn in an essay as his final exam grade. He left campus and went home early, before most people had even taken their first final, without turning in such an essay. He planned on finishing the essay during the break. However, he spent all of winter break doing God-knows-what, but definitely not that essay. He came back to campus for the new semester, with the goal of finishing the essay very soon. Days became weeks. He had a big "INCOMPLETE" on his transcript for that class. There was a deadline that was approaching in which all "INCOMPLETES" automatically became Fs. He knew he had to have a grade for that class by then, so he tried to finish his essay a few days before the deadline to give the teacher enough time to grade it and save his "INCOMPLETE" from F-dom. Didn't happen. He eventually got his essay in, but the deadline passed and an "INCOMPLETE" still glared on his transcript. The essay itself was crap of course, filled with a bunch of quotes from his variant sources, with little of his own work. He prayed for a miracle, but to no avail. Soon, as promised, the "INCOMPLETE" became an F. His GPA plummeted to the low depths of Hell, never to be saved. All was despair, but he never faltered in his unwavering faith.

And now to the story of today! Something glorious happened. It had already been over two months since the day he was supposed to have his final exam essay submitted. He had been checking Penn InTouch regularly to view his transcript, hoping the professor had been able to grade his essay and give him a real grade for the class. He scrolled down as usual, expecting the usual F, and saw something only God could have wrought.

A-

And that is the story of St. Frank-Paul Sampino, Patron Saint of Procrastination, who shines like a beacon of hope and gives inspiration to college-age procrastinators around the world. Remember, if you are ever in need of some miracle, if you ever find yourself having to pull an all-nighter to write a paper, study for an exam, or do a project, if you ever want to hit yourself in the head for all the procrastination you shouldn't have done, if you ever feel overwhelmed by all the homework and reading that piles up, just take a deep breath, and pray... to St. Frank.